by Minal Wajed
India: a densely populated country with over twenty languages, scripted in thirteen different ways, spoken in about seven hundred and twenty different dialects. How do women talk about their sexual needs in this country? Well, they don’t.
Expressing sexual desires is deemed taboo and should only be uttered behind closed 
doors. People aren’t supposed to be crude about their personal lives. It is distasteful to mention sex, especially by Indian women. There is an expectation for Indian women to be pure in character and maintain this purity by upholding Indian family values. Because of this, women shouldn’t delve into matters of such explicit nature. Therefore, any sex talk is almost always designated as a male-associated topic.
The honor code thrust upon Indian women and how it inhibits their sexual needs is the center of Erotic Stories for Punjabi Widows by Balli Kaur Jaswal. The novel explores roles of Punjabi widows living in London, still carrying out their traditional Indian values out of patriarchal societal pressure and less on their individual inclination to fulfill these roles. In an effort to form a support group for the widows, a young Punjabi girl is given the task to teach in a formal classroom setting how to read and write English, even though these widows have lived in London for years. Though this turns out to be nothing less than a miracle since these women acquire a voice through this class, a voice used to release pent up emotions in an unusual way.
In this class, the widows tell stories, and not just any stories, erotic stories. These stories are very detailed, perhaps an effort by the widows to relive the pleasures they once experienced but now only possible through their imagination. These stories are very graphic and don’t discriminate against homosexuality. Talking about homosexuality in such an explicit manner is considered promiscuous for Indian women since the Indian culture prohibits them from engaging in such activities otherwise. But through this class, these widows are able to share stories that go beyond values, expectations, and the honor code.
In a way, these erotic stories are helping the widows to break free from the honor code that prohibits them from expressing their needs. The honor code itself is a man-made concept, structured to keep the women under the impression that their behavior reflects the honor of their family. This honor can’t be compromised under any circumstances since that will negatively affect the status of their family. In a patriarchal society where honor determines the status of a person, there is little room for the women to experience true freedom. Things as little as coming home late at night are looked down upon. Thus, any type of sexual activities are kept as a secret by the women to avoid accusations of being called vulgar by their community.
In this novel, the widows experience discrimination in many ways. Perhaps, the biggest way is being considered inferior among others in their community. The title of a widow alone is deemed dreadful since this entails a woman left with no supervision of a man. In this way, widows are able to do what they please, yet many don’t act upon it since they want to avoid a dishonorable reputation. The widows in this novel don’t engage in sexual acts and instead resort to telling these erotic stories. These stories not only exemplify their sexual needs, but also portray the restrictive social expectations put upon widows in an Indian society. Erotic Stories for Punjabi Widows leaves many topics up for discussion, perhaps the biggest one being restrictions put upon women that limits their abilities to experience life on their own terms.