December is upon us, and while procrastinating for your finals, you’ve probably started to think about what presents to buy all the people in your life, from your closest family and friends to the ones you only think about once a year. This holiday season is my fourth year in retail, and as someone who has been doing their high school job for way too long, I have some tips for you on what-not-to-do while shopping for all of those important gifts:
1) Don’t yell at your sales associate/etc. We understand that you’re frustrated. We are too. And we’ve had to deal with about a thousand other people yelling at us for the last six hours of our shift, so we will have absolutely no problem spitting in your food, “accidentally” dropping your merchandise, or “forgetting” to give you a receipt. I promise.
2) If your coupon doesn’t work, I probably can’t do anything about it. Seriously. The corporate big-wigs don’t give that kind of power to associates. While some stores honor expired coupons many don’t, and I honestly don’t understand why customers just expect us to. The expiration date is right in front of you, we print it on the coupon for a reason. Please exercise your grade school education.
3) If you’re going to try a lot of stuff on or ask for a lot of help, please only do so on a day where you are actually capable of making a purchase. Most of us work on commission, so if you tell me your budget is $50 and you want to try on five different products in three sizes each and waste ninety minutes of my time asking if they make you look fat, I will probably say “yes” and walk away to help that customer who is holding $250 boots and a very long shopping list.
4) Don’t put things off until the last minute. I know your daughter wants the newest Uggs for Christmas and will hate you for the rest of her life if she doesn’t get them. So does every other thirteen year old in the tri-state area, which is why we sold out of them on November 28th. It’s not my fault or my problem that you didn’t care enough to get your shopping done before December 23rd. Tough luck.
5) If you are going to take your children shopping with you, for god’s sake put them on a leash. In a stroller. Anywhere, really, where they can’t escape and run around and knock over our displays and get their sticky, grimy, little paws all over our merchandise. I have no problem making you pay for the damages, and I could probably recommend some obedience classes while I’m at it.
So there you go! Some quick tips for productive, pleasant holiday shopping. These are just a few highlights from a long list, so in summary the rule is “don’t be an a**hole”. Happy holidays, and give me your money (I work for commission)!
Michelle Chen